|How To Deal With Unrequited Love|
Do you love someone who doesn't love you back? Do you long for someone who is unavailable? Do you still have strong feelings for your ex-partner? As hard as it is to hear, there might someone out there who's confessed they don't want to date you anymore. If you've been rejected, know that it happens and it'll be OK.
Social psychologist, Roy Baumeister says 98% of people have suffered from unrequited love at one point in their life. So what should you do about it? how do you move on? well, here are a few tips on how to deal with unrequited love.
1. Let go and accept the end of a possible relationship with them.
If you notice that they seem comfortable discussing your feelings, tell them how you feel about them. An open discussion about your feelings may be the best way to start the conversation.
Once you realise how they feel, you might find it easier to come to terms with the situation and move forward.
I don't think they feel the same way? In this case, you should accept how they feel and stop considering a relationship with them. They've let you know that they're not interested in a romantic relationship with you.
Finding out how they feel can be helpful in understanding the emotions surrounding when you broke up and why it didn't work out. This can be a way of beginning to move on. If they don't reciprocate your feelings, then give up. Stop emailing them or messaging them on social media sites and let go. If something doesn't happen, then it's time to move forward with a different plan.
2. Try not to daydream about them.
When do you accept the end of a possible relationship? Have you ever had a strong crush on someone who you think might like you back but you don't know how they feel? If so, tell them how you feel.
Don't think that'll work? Try looking for signs they like you in the first place. Do they get nervous, smile around me, engage in conversation with me, stare at me, seem interested in what I have to say, even know I exist?
If they show that they cannot be interested in you and appears to not have the time to talk, it's best if you stop daydreaming.
Catch yourself daydreaming about them? Distract your attention by focusing on something else you desire. This could be a hobby, passion, or goal!
3. Allow yourself to mourn the idea of not being with them.
If you're still struggling to come to terms with the fact that your crush doesn't seem interested in you back, don't fret too much! It's important for you to realise that although the outcome may not be what you hoped for, it's now time for you to accept this outcome and look forward.
It was an idea, a daydream, or perhaps you were together at one point, but you both have changed. Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you're feeling. You should welcome this feeling of sadness, cry, and open up to somebody if you can. It will probably be a lot easier after your done sharing all these emotions and they don't feel so intense anymore.
It is natural to feel a certain way strongly. It can be difficult and confusing, but remember that it is a normal reaction to loss. If you allow yourself to grieve and mourn, it may be easier to put these feelings behind you with time acceptance.
4. Consider taking up new activities as well as spending some time working on your creative projects.
Practice up on that old guitar, start crafting songs again. Teach yourself a skill you always wanted to master or make plans for a vacation!
All of these things are great distractions and the distraction that adds to your progress and learning is even better. Turn the focus on yourself instead, or pour your heart into something else besides romantic love. You may even find unrequited love in different places.
5. Realize they're not perfect
Sounds like you might be projecting a lot of preconceived notions onto your crush. Just think about it and ask yourself if they're perfect or not.
Are you only noticing your crush's flaws because of the way that you've built them up in your head? we're all human and we all have flaws, but when it comes to our partners, we tend to overlook their imperfections. have you been distracted by the image of your perfect partner that isn't based on reality?
You may have built up your crush too much in your mind so that they seem perfect, but in reality they're simply human and not perfect. The sooner you realize this and come to terms with it, the easier it will be to move on from them.
6. Know that there won't always be closure.
You might not always find closure, so it's important to move on and stop looking for it. You can't depend on being able to get closure, or else you'll never move past the relationship. Giving up could lead to regret in the future, as you may end up stuck there while other opportunities pass you by
If you have a crush on someone who isn't available, then there's nothing more you can do. The best thing to do is to stop waiting for signs they don't give.
There may be moments where they can't give you the closure you need or provide the support you're looking for. The trick is to keep moving forward, rather than fixating on the past. If you keep doing this, you may realize that time self reflection can bring about closure. The book may close on the experience in a different way - by making it into a different chapter in your life's story.
So how will you deal with unrequited love? what will be your distraction?
This Post republished on medium.