Bill Engvall 21 Corking Quotes

Bill Engvall 21 Corking Quotese

A lot of times you go to a concert, and when you leave, you don't know anything more about the act then when you got there.

— Bill Engvall

I can't count the number of times I've been sound asleep, woke up, and I was doing my hair.

— Bill Engvall

I don't pick on people.

— Bill Engvall

I learned that you don't take dishes from the table to the dishwasher; you have to rinse them first. I think that's stupid because I don't go out in the back yard and hose off before taking a shower.

— Bill Engvall

The one thing people like about my show is it's universal. Everybody can relate to it. I think people enjoy going to a show and saying, 'Something like that happened to me.'

— Bill Engvall

No sooner my kids leave their friends than they start texting them. And it's all in code in a language I totally don't understand.

— Bill Engvall

In syndication, the biggest buyers are car dealerships.

— Bill Engvall

I don't have big time celebrity friends - I'm just a guy.

— Bill Engvall

I am feeling older every day.

— Bill Engvall

I have been passed over on some things because people didn't think I was edgy enough. But the people who took those gigs are gone now, and I am still here.

— Bill Engvall

I dream of acting with Kevin Costner. I would love to do a movie with him. Not something funny, but a dramatic role.

— Bill Engvall

I've really got no complaints.

— Bill Engvall

To be honest with you, I still eat whatever I want. It's all about portion control. I still love pizza, but instead of eating half, I eat a slice.

— Bill Engvall

I eat fish, chicken, vegetables and other healthier foods. I do love a great steak.

— Bill Engvall

My belief is that if we take away that right to bear arms, the only people that are going to have them are... the ones breaking into your house.

— Bill Engvall

I don't believe there's any reason for a person like myself to own an AK-47.

— Bill Engvall

I think you can ban guns if you can just pull the trigger and 60 bullets fire out.

— Bill Engvall

I like to hang on to cars. I'm not one of these guys that goes flipping cars all the time. If I find a car I like, I stick with it.

— Bill Engvall

I'm from Texas. You would think my biggest draw would be in that state. But my biggest draw is Pennsylvania.

— Bill Engvall

I have fun on stage, so people think maybe they should, too.

— Bill Engvall

What I do is not regional comedy, and it is not based in the southern area.

— Bill Engvall

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